Q&A Time: Unbearable Best Friends

Hello my confused friends. It's that space again in the blog, where I answer a fictional someone's conundrum pertaining to life, technology and cookies. Welcome to,

 'Hypothetical Questions & Answers'

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The question of the space comes from Sam of Crouquette City, who asks,

Q: 

Dear Blogger/Vimal/I.I,

I have a best friend who's always been there for me, through thick and thin. I know he's always got my back, and we generally have a good time. But of late, he seems to have become annoying. He causes great pain and grief by getting in the way of everything. He acts crazy sometimes.
For instance, I was deeply hurt when he lay passed out in the middle of the street like a drunk hobo. If I wasn't there, he'd probably have been walked over by those busy downtown businessmen. He has let go of himself, and hasn't shaved for ever.

We don't see eye to eye these days, and there are occasions where I had to chase him away.

Can you please help me solve this issue?

A:

Dear Sam,

This situation is surprisingly pretty common among big-tailed dogs like you. I suggest you get used to your tail being there.

You could surgically remove it, but look at how weird a doberman is without its tail. Just be more careful around moving objects like cars and people, and ask your owner to trim your fur all over. It must be the heat, after all.

Follow my advice, and you should be fine. Hope I've been able to help you out. Thank you for sending in your question.

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So that's it for now folks. If you have a hypothetical question that needs answering, ask away! Until next time, I bid you, vida!